Not Just Talk Therapy,

Change Therapy

Individual, Couples, & Group Therapy in Hermosa Beach & Online Throughout California

Regina Abayev JD, LMFT

Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist
#148775

Request Appointment

Transformative Therapy
for
Complex Lives

Whether you are navigating the quiet friction of a disconnected relationship, the weight of unaddressed trauma, or the confusing gap between your external success and your internal reality, the path forward isn't always clear.

Even if you are accustomed to relying on yourself, there are moments when you need to broaden your perspective and lean on support to navigate the truly difficult terrain. Life is complex. People are complex. And whether you are here for yourself, your relationship, or your family, you are likely looking for more than just a sympathetic ear. You are looking for clarity, you are looking for a shift in perspective, and ultimately, you are looking for change.You are likely looking for more than a sympathetic ear. You are seeking clarity. You want to understand the undercurrents of your life, and ultimately, you are looking for a profound shift in how you live it.

Welcome to a practice designed for depth.

My approach is built on a single premise: Insight without action is just observation.

However, I also know that meaningful action cannot happen without safety. Therapy shouldn't just be a retrospective of your week; it should be a catalyst for your growth. We won’t simply catalog what is happening. We will examine why it is happening—looking at the patterns, the hidden wounds, and the blind spots that obscure your view—with deep compassion.

This is a space for people who are ready to understand the architecture of their own lives and relationships, and who are looking for a partner to help redesign it.

Depth, Healing, and Practical Solutions

I do not subscribe to the "blank slate" model of therapy where you speak into a void and I simply nod. That passive approach rarely serves the clients I work with, nor does it honor the complexity of your experience.

Engagement with me is an active, intellectual, and emotional partnership. We go deep to unearth the roots of your disconnection, but we do so at a pace that respects your nervous system. I work from a trauma-informed perspective, which means I understand that the behaviors you might be frustrated with—perfectionism, control, shutting down—were often brilliant adaptations that helped you survive earlier chapters of your life.

We don’t shame those defenses; we seek to understand them. This includes the parts of your story you might be hesitant to share. We all have a past, and we all carry shame about behaviors, addictions, or actions we aren’t proud of. My office is a judgment-free environment where we don't try to erase those chapters; instead, we work to make meaning of them. By understanding where you have been, we can stop the past from defining your future.

I am interested in the whole person—the high-performing professional, the partner seeking connection, the parent navigating the unknown, and the human being underneath it all.

A Capacity for Complexity

My career did not begin in the quiet of a therapy office. For nearly twenty years, I operated in high-stakes environments—leading teams at global investment banks, raising capital for unicorns, and structuring billion-dollar transactions.

I don’t share this to list accolades, but to offer context. My time in those arenas taught me that the most critical variables are never technical—they are human. I learned to read the room, to hear what was being left unsaid, and to understand the profound human need for validation and safety.

That background shapes the way I work today. I combine deep clinical training with a sharp, lived reality that cannot be replicated in a classroom.

I view your life through multiple lenses: the analytical precision of a JD and trained mediator, combined with the psychological depth of advanced doctoral training in intimacy and connection. But perhaps most crucially, I bring the texture of my own life. I know the weight of high achievement, the delicate balance of career and parenthood, and the grit required to navigate complex family dynamics.

This combination allows me to be less robotic and more human. I understand the relentless drive to build, just as well as I understand the messy, beautiful, and sometimes painful dynamics that happen behind closed doors. You do not get a silent observer. You get a compassionate partner who sees the full picture and knows how to help you heal and move forward.

How We Work Together

Individual & Couples Therapy Whether we are navigating a career pivot, repairing the fractures of a betrayal, or healing from past trauma, the goal is sustainable change. I help you articulate the needs you have silenced and identify the behaviors that keep you in stagnation. Then, with empathy and clarity, we create a path toward the evolution you want to see.

Therapy Intensives (Accelerated Options) For those navigating a crisis or anyone who prefers to move with velocity, I offer Therapy Intensives. These are concentrated, high-impact sessions designed to achieve months of progress in a condensed window. It is deep work, delivered efficiently and safely.

Who I Work With

I work with individuals, families, and couples who are ready to move beyond venting and start healing. We will explore how your history shapes your present, but our focus is always forward-looking. My goal is to help you find peace with the past so you can build a future that feels authentic.

Common Areas of Focus:

  • High-Functioning Anxiety & Perfectionism

  • Relationship Conflict, Communication, and Infidelity

  • Executive Burnout & Career Stress

  • Healing from Trauma & Family of Origin Issues

  • Imposter Syndrome & Self-Worth

If things were simple, you wouldn’t be here.

Common Therapy Concerns:

  • You might be experiencing:

    • Burnout: That crushing exhaustion – emotional, physical, and mental – from too much stress.

    • Anxiety and Fear of Failure: The pressure to succeed can trigger intense fear, even where you excel.

    • A Sense of Unfulfillment: That "successful but not happy" feeling, a lack of purpose.

    • Perfectionism and Self-Criticism: The relentless drive for "perfect" that makes it hard to enjoy your wins.

    • Indecisiveness: Struggling with big decisions, personally and professionally.

    • Imposter Syndrome: That nagging feeling you're a fraud, despite all evidence to the contrary.

    • Trouble Relaxing: Difficulty switching off and enjoying downtime.

    • Lack of Self-Compassion: Being your own worst critic.

    • Identity Issues: Feeling lost or unsure who you are outside of work or other roles.

    • Difficulty Asking for Help: The belief you have to handle everything solo.

    • Emotional Numbness: Shutting down emotions.

    • Difficulty Delegating: The idea that only you can do things "right," leading to overload

    • Fear of Transition: Resistance to needed life changes.

    • Risk Aversion: Hesitancy to take calculated risks, even when they could be beneficial.

    • Risky Behaviors: Engaging in activities that have negative consequences, despite knowing the risks.

  • You and your partner(s) might be dealing with:

    • Lack of Intimacy: Emotional or physical distance.

    • Feeling Disconnected: A sense of isolation from each other.

    • Communication Problems: Difficulty expressing needs and feelings.

    • Trust Issues: Hardship trusting others, perhaps due to past experiences.

    • Fear of Vulnerability: Difficulty being open and honest.

    • Power Imbalances: Unequal dynamics in the relationship.

    • Work-Life Imbalance: Conflict and resentment from struggling to juggle everything.

    • Feeling Used or Exploited: The sense that people are only interested in what you can offer.

    • Strained Relationships: Neglecting important connections.

    • Infidelity: Emotional or physical affairs, breaches of trust.

    • Conflict at Work: Stressful and unproductive situations with colleagues or superiors.

    • Overwhelm: The constant stress of managing too much.

    • Stagnation: Feeling stuck or lacking progress in your career.

    • Disappointment: Experiencing setbacks or unmet expectations in your professional life.

    • Turning to overwork, social media, over-exercising, restrictive eating, drinking, prescription medication misuse, or other behaviors that once seemed helpful but are now causing harm.

    • Constant Comparison: Feeling inadequate compared to others.

    • Pressure to Succeed: The fear of slipping up.

    • Expectations from Others: Feeling weighed down by what others expect.

    • Fear of Judgment: Worrying about others' opinions.

    • Difficulty Saying No: Overcommitting.

    • Financial Stress: Even with good income, feeling stressed about finances.

How I Help:

My approach combines deep insight with practical strategy. We start by uncovering the root patterns driving your struggles. Then, we build a plan to change them. I focus on giving you tangible tools for stress management, boundaries, and high-stakes communication—helping you move from 'just coping' to a life that is authentic and aligned.

The Goal:

Our work is about building the capacity to enjoy the life you have worked so hard to create. We aim for more than just stress reduction; we aim for a life lived with intention. You can expect to build deeper, more honest relationships, and find the freedom to navigate challenges with a sense of calm and clarity that comes from the inside out.

  • Areas of Focus Include:

    Anxiety, Depression, Grief, Stress, Eating Disorders, Self-Harm, Relational Issues, Trauma, PTSD, Addiction, Problematic Sexual Behaviors, Finding a Sense of Self and Purpose

  • Areas of Focus Include:

    High-Conflict Couples Therapy, Discernment Counseling, Pre-Marital Counseling, Separation/Divorce Counseling, Co-Parenting Post-Separation, Mismatched Desire, Lack of Intimacy, Infidelity Recovery, and Non-Traditional Relationships.

  • Explore Relationship Patterns, Build Trust and Connection, Understanding Unconscious Patterns, Develop Insight & Growth, Develop Socializing Techniques

    What Happens in Group Therapy?

    In this group, I foster an environment of trust and understanding. You'll have the opportunity to share openly, receive honest feedback, and learn from the experiences of others. It's a space to experiment with new behaviors, challenge old patterns, and find your place in the world.

    Reach out to learn more and join the waitlist.

  • Areas of focus include:

    Feeling Different, Body Image, Anxiety, Depression, Relationships, School Stress, Sports & Performance, Big Life Changes, Dropping Grades, Risky Behaviors

  • Areas of Focus Include:

    Communication Breakdowns, Behavioral Concerns in Children or Teens, Sibling Conflicts, Adjusting to Major Life Changes, Blended Family Challenges, and Parenting Disputes.

Therapy Services

More about my services
Request Appointment

ABOUT ME

Learn more about me here

MY PRACTICE

My clients describe me as warm, non-judgmental, direct, and curious. I don’t hide behind long silences or academic theories. I believe therapy should be an active conversation where we explore the source of your struggles, find relief, and use humor to lighten the load.

I am here to provide insightful guidance and the push you need to challenge old patterns. We won’t just talk about the problem; we will uncover what is hindering your growth and build a path forward that feels authentic to who you actually are.

PROFESSIONAL LIFE

My understanding of high-pressure environments comes from living in them. My career spans 19+ years across law, investment banking, and early leadership roles in tech startups. I know that sustainable success requires a strong foundation of personal and relational well-being.

I use this experience to help clients navigate the specific toll that ambition takes on mental health and relationships. I understand the weight of high-stakes decisions and the difficulty of finding meaning outside of work. My familiarity with this world allows me to meet you with deep understanding from day one. This gives us the freedom to focus entirely on you—your story and your relationships—so we can work toward a life that feels more connected, grounded, and real.

FAMILY & PARENTHOOD

I don’t just understand family dynamics clinically; I live them. As a parent to two teenagers, I am in the thick of navigating modern adolescence—including the complexities of identity, independence, and belonging.

I also understand that life rarely follows a straight line. Having navigated divorce, co-parenting, and the nuances of a blended family, I know what it takes to rebuild and find stability when the picture changes. I bring this lived experience into the room to help you navigate these emotionally charged and complex transitions with clarity and care.

Contact Info:

Hermosa Beach Office

2309 Pacific Coast Hwy Suite #202
Hermosa Beach, CA 90254-2751

Phone Number & Email
(323) 646-6263
info@reginaabayev.com

 
Modern living room with leather sofa, colorful artwork, red and blue chairs, a geometric coffee table, floor-to-ceiling window, and decorative plants.

My office is located on the border of Hermosa and Manhattan Beach

My office is located in the heart of Hermosa Beach about a 10-minute walk from Pier Ave. and a 15-minute walk from the beach.

In-person and virtual sessions are offered during the week, as well as evening and weekend availability.

Serving Nearby Cities:

  • Manhattan Beach

  • Marina Del Rey

  • Redondo Beach

  • Torrance

  • El Segundo

  • Palos Verdes

  • Rolling Hills

  • Playa Vista

  • Greater Los Angeles